Apology and Forgiveness
“What if I’m not survived?” This thought constantly lingered on my mind when I did a self-isolation at home. I got positive for COVID-19 in early July—when the second wave hit Indonesia horribly. It was such a roller coaster condition, emotionally. My parents had it first but thanks to completed doses of the vaccine, we only had mild symptoms. My mind was wandering to every corner of possibility, including the thought of me not being survived and left me with no chance to apologize to people whom I did wrong in the past. I knew I will be fine and recover soon but I couldn’t lie that I’m afraid at that time. What if I suddenly have hard breathing and then die? I realize the psychological aspect is an important coping mechanism to prepare when a person gets the virus. It was draining. One of the people I feel guilty about is my ex from college. And I know the universe has set up something when I suddenly met him a week ago. It’s been a very long time. 8 years ago! We parted not in