Showing posts from April, 2018

Do Not Force (Detachment Part 2)

When you practice self-love, you realize that your happiness is the top priority. You put yourself first then things will be different. “Detachment doesn’t mean not caring. It’s taking care of yourself first and letting others take responsibility for their actions without trying to save or punish them.” – Pinterest. This is the second lesson I’d like to talk about: Don’t force situations. Shit happens, including in relationship. A moment when your inner circle doesn't invite you to movie time. A moment when your best friend is getting far because s/he spends most of the weekends with his/her bae. A moment when you need to talk to your ex but s/he avoids you and remains silent. A moment when you are slightly forgotten or left. I know it hurts, dear. The truth can be ugly sometimes. But, that’s the truth. Nothing more valuable than a plate of the truths on your table. Now it is your turn to define a response. This kind of occasions made me upset in the past. I blamed them at

Love Yourself First (Detachment Part 1)

Detachment. This word caught my eyes when I was reading an article about self-healing on a website. It is the opposite of attachment and I bet it would be an interesting topic to discuss as these days some people feel easily attached to mundane things. Afterward, I googled to learn more about it (mostly from Pinterest) and got startled, like, Damn, why I just found out this lesson by now?! Here's my personal summary on detachment. It has many beautiful thoughts but I love to start with two: 1. Allow others to be who they are 2. Allow yourself to be who you are By fully understanding these lessons, things will come lighter. I feel more relieved in accepting any kind of situations (not only about a heartbreak thingy), especially on hard times. One big point I slowly realize is that I can't control things that had happened, but I can always control my response to them, right? I can choose my action that I'm aware it would be the best version of myself. But, remembe

True Color

"The only constant is change." - Heraclitus My friend sent me that quote after I conveyed something to her, "When I was graduated, my desire was to get a job far far away from home. I felt very happy when I got a chance to work in Atambua. I didn't expect that a feeling could change. Now, I just want to spend more time at home, haha, I don't know why." A quote from Heraclitus makes me suddenly realize that a feeling I've once had is not wrong. A feeling could change someday. And, probably, there's nothing wrong about showing an emotion we experience. The only part that is wrong is some people in our society cannot accept any expression that they don't commonly see. A social construction forces us to welcome values the society have been believing since long time ago. Pardon. I'm just getting random. This morning, I found that quote and could relate a little bit to something I experienced in my last relationship. One day, I told my ex that

2017: Break into Pieces

Hello. It's been a long time. Many things happened--the painful one. Thus, I need a little time to gather all the courage and get back to my rhythm. 2017 was just as wonderful as my previous years. I signed up for several trail races. The adrenaline rush and I enjoyed it a lot. I was in my best condition both physically and mentally. Closing the year, a heartbreak came, the worst I've ever had in my life. I reached the lowest point as a human being. The only mindset I currently had about myself was just uselessness. It led me once to a thought to donate one of my kidneys if it could make me feel useful again. LOL. "Sometimes, we forget to appreciate a tiny progress we have made on a day. We only focus on the big result. I give you one Chinese proverb, man man lai. Pelan-pelan aja. Santai, Git. Apresiasi setiap progres, walaupun kecil." @rdudayev, 2018 Regarding the hard times I have been facing, I just realize I did many things in recent months. I le